My boyfriend has been accepted into the Air Force. The cool thing is that when I was younger I had always dreamt of fighting amongst the clouds. Sailing through the sky in a F-15 strike eagle. How I loved that plane. Then I dreamt of being a Blue Angel...but then I realized most were just old men that have retired from the force. I spoke to my parents when I was 14 about joining the air force and go to the Air Force Academy in Colorado Springs, Colorado for college. I even went to visit. Let's just say that dream was soon gone and I was left trying to plan my future career. Now...now my baby is leaving.
I don't know when he will leave, but I am trying to spend as much time as I can with him. I am so thrilled and excited for him, but I have this pit that leaves me terrified all the same. I won't leave him, that is just stupid. I truly love him, so I am not going to break up with him just because he is leaving. I already told him I plan on writing him and sending him care packages...but it is just not the same having him here.
Some people may say I am immature, "stupid", or just irrational....but that is just because I am 18. Anyone can say they love someone, but can everyone really show it? I think I can. Love is not a word that is to be thrown around like a bargaining chip. You are not supposed to just say the words "I love you" when you get into a relationship to keep someone around. You are supposed to use the words "I love you" when you truly mean it. People say love cannot be fully understood until you are mature and wise. Well, when is that? I believe love changes with age. There are different types of love as well, but each change as we grow.
Parental love remains the same except our views of our parents go from innocent child love to admiration and caring love. Love for siblings goes along the same route. Love for others is debatable. When you are five, you might really think you are in love with the boy that sits next to you in class. Maybe you are, but as you grow your love develops as you do. When you get older love changes to focusing on looks, then personality, then marriage, and so on. Some people never grow out of a younger view of love, making them seem immature and childish. These people are usually the ones that don't settle down until late in life or never at all. Girls usually sophisticate in love faster than males. Girls begin to look for traits for a husband, father, and friend around my age and on. Men don't really start looking for that until their 20's and on. That is why I am dating a 21 year old.
I honestly don't expect anyone to really read this....this is kind of just for my own personal venting and unwinding issues. I just found out the news of my boyfriends acceptance and figured I needed something to vent to. If you are reading this then I am sorry...if you enjoy it then by all means read as much as you would like.
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